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Except that I do believe that there are foundational genres of meta that kind of set you up as a fan. These are:
• A history of fandom and fanfiction in its own right and in the context of the wider literary canon, especially as part of that canon.
• The history and development of the AO3. (If you spend a lot of time on it or that website is otherwise important to you.)
• The patriarchy and you: racism, phobias, and oppression within fandom.
The first genre has a lot to do with external validation and seeing yourself in the world, and so my rec for this evening is:
The Boy Who Lived Forever by Lev Grossman, which was published in 2011 by Time and remains the best overview of fandom for outsiders that I've ever read - it's not a bad overview for insiders, either - though the landscape has shifted a bit in the intervening years.